The Calm One Wins
A person in “It doesn’t matter to me” mode isn’t indifferent. They’re in a frame of mind where they can come up with solutions. “A bottle fell and broke. It’s not the end of the world. There’s nothing we can do about it right now. We’ll find a solution to this situation, too. I’ll solve these problems—we’ll solve them together. Don’t worry, relax,” they say.
If a person is irritable and their blood pressure rises in every situation, they lack the ability to solve problems. Their mind is clouded. It is impossible to come up with solutions or overcome problems while in that foggy, high-blood-pressure state. They absolutely cannot find a solution.
FIND A COMMON GROUND
A person with the “It doesn’t matter to me” mindset is someone with life experience. When a problem arises, they talk it out without arguing and find a mutual solution. They never shy away from a problem. Someone who behaves this way is self-confident—they trust themselves and can come up with solutions.
The “I don’t care” mindset isn’t about sweeping relationship problems under the rug. On the contrary, it’s a mindset that allows you to calmly confront issues and resolve misunderstandings. Because someone in this state of mind can communicate effectively and discuss matters comfortably, they can certainly convince the other person as well. They listen to the other person with a calm demeanor. Problems sometimes stem from not listening to the other person. They know that listening is a good way to solve problems.
TRYING TO UNDERSTAND
A self-centered person won’t acknowledge when someone else is right. Because doing so would mean trampling on their ego. They don’t have the courage to act that way. Even when they are in the wrong, they persist and insist on their position until the very end. Even if they realize this, they won’t back down. In tense situations, they become so preoccupied with how to cause pain to the other person—which words to use to hurt them, how to rub salt into their wounds—that they shut their ears and refuse to listen at all. Even if the other person is saying the right things, they succumb to their ego.
For a character in “I don’t care” mode, what matters most is understanding what the other person means. They approach situations with empathy, striving to understand events and people. They evaluate issues without compromising their own personality or style. When they are at fault or in the wrong, they admit their mistake. Without arguing with the other person, they calmly try to make amends. People with this personality type are at peace in their relationships because they always find a way to reach an understanding with the other person, no matter the situation.
